Killed because of a meat pie, the girl with the Cher Lloyd look, and the first dog went for her throat, allegedly, though if she was alone in the house at the time how would anyone know? The small house for small people made of small red bricks which tone in with the pink lips and rosy-tinted skin of the hairless bull mastiff with its pink thing ready and erect. As depicted in the Facebook photos shown on the Daily Mirror website which may (or may not) belong to dog-owner Beverley or schoolfriend-of-the-deceased Kimberley; and why not call them Sentimenterley and Fecklessley while we’re at it? Knowing nothing about any of these people, dead or alive, except what fits the shock horror format, it would be oh so easy to slot the whole lot of them into Shameless. The People from the Estate, Episode 553. Head lowered, the police constable performing a guard dog routine at the front door, can even get away with burying his chin in his chest to stave off the cold; that, or he’s going for a bit of shut-eye. Either way it’s not the mark of respect mandated for, say, Royalty. Instead, in her untimely death, Jade Anderson has joined the firm of working class teenagers whose lives only come to the fore when they briefly coincide with scripted scenes of anti-social behaviour. But what if she just wasn’t true to the form someone else filled in for her? Perhaps one day in March, cold and bright, she recognised the sunset echoed in red brick turning pink. Maybe she looked at the head of Neo, another bull mastiff, and compared it to that of Samuel Beckett – lugubrious, muscular and austere. As you and I would do. In any case, let’s learn how to write about her properly – in a way that appropriates what she really was – instead of typing her up and moving along to the next specimen in the pool.